Then a Tall Stillness

 

then a tall stillness

from this small hill I hold onto

today’s clouds

###

This poem was written in response to On The Trail With Basho Encore 4 such stillness, another great prompt hosted by Chèvrefeuille at Carpe Diem Haiku Kai. All of the poems in the link-up can be read here. And, to finish, here’s The Orb –
 

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5 thoughts on “Then a Tall Stillness

    • The clouds were so immense, still and solid-looking in the blue sky that day that it felt as if you could easily travel up there and walk around to your heart’s content – a very restful feeling! And when I tried to describe it, this was the phrase that came to mind. Glad you liked it.

  1. Echoing Moondust — “tall stillness” stopped me in my tracks. (Am I allowed to say ‘wow’ too?) Wondering about “onto” – perhaps it could be cut without losing meaning? (Saying that as someone who struggles mightily with articles and prepositions on a daily basis, so perhaps I’m wrong!) Still — ‘tall stillness’ is wonderful. 🙂

    (And — your blog has the best soundtrack!) 😉

    • Ah so that’s a preposition? My grasp of the technical terms of English grammar has been kept to a ridiculous minimum, either by choice or laziness… I’m too lazy to decide which 🙂

      You’re right, of course. The haiku works very nicely without ‘onto.’ I included it due to the pleasing dizziness that occurred as I stopped staring into, and being absorbed by, the tall stillness – a brief feeling of having to hold onto something 🙂

      As for ‘tall stillness’, as I just mentioned to Moondust:
      The clouds were so immense, still and solid-looking in the blue sky that day that it felt as if you could easily travel up there and walk around to your heart’s content – a very restful feeling! And when I tried to describe it, this was the phrase that came to mind.

      Thanks, Jen!

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