hazily, blue
bells are parted by each footstep –
her silence arrives
###
This poem was written in response to Carpe Diem #732 “A bell at sunset”, another great prompt hosted by Chèvrefeuille at Carpe Diem Haiku Kai. All of the poems in the link-up can be read here. And, to finish, here’s Chet Baker –
Striking last line!
Thanks, Janice. As usual (and maybe as you find too?) I had the first two lines for ages before finally getting a 3rd line that seemed to work, at around midnight…
Oh, she has magic footsteps! 😉
Long Before Sunset
Nope, she’s just walking in the opposite direction 🙂
Echoing Janice — that’s quite a last line! And quite an image overall — and I like the effect you’ve created in splitting “blue bells” between the first and second line. Nicely done, Blake! 😀
Thanks, Jen. Yes, I um-ed and ah-ed about splitting the bluebells or not, but I remembered Jane R using an example of a one-line haiku to show how the meaning can change depending on where the reader believes the break to come – and I liked that, although I prefer the appearance of three 3-lines in a post 🙂
It was a gamble but it worked very well here 🙂
“her silence arrives” is such a powerful verse… It paradoxically speaks out loud… All the best to you, dear Sue. Aquileana ⭐
True, Aquileana – sometimes a person’s silence can grow very loud, and their absence can have a presence all of its own. I’m glad you liked the line 🙂
And see you soon in Ancient Greece…