Last Snow


last snow

a raven marches over

the smokers cough


This poem was written in response to Carpe Diem Haiku Writing Techniques #12, Resume, another great prompt hosted by Chèvrefeuille at Carpe Diem Haiku Kai. This post at CDHK summed up all of the haiku writing techniques we’ve been working through over the past few weeks and we were asked to write a new haiku using any of these techniques – so, I think the above haiku probably has an element of juxtaposition and/or surprise.

All of the poems in the link-up can be read here. And, to finish, here’s the Platters –

19 thoughts on “Last Snow

  1. Ooh … this is eerie …and coupled with such a sweet song it has a sort of “David Lynch” feel to it, you know? Part nature, part metaphor. DEFINITELY surprise AND juxtaposition here. Wow!

    • I hadn’t thought of a Lynchian aspect with the song (I spent ages looking for something related to smoke and finally found this, which I always loved – when his voice really opens up..!) but yes, I see what you mean. Btw has the new Twin Peaks started yet?

      I’m glad you found surprise and juxtaposition in the haiku, too – neither of which are concepts I would have really looked to include before the CDHK writing techniques posts. Thanks, Jen 🙂

      • Quite welcome! Yes, those writing techniques have been SO helpful — pushes a writer into new directions. Did you see Chev has the techniques compiled now at CDHK?

        No Twin Peaks yet — we won’t see it till 2016, though filming starts this year (

      • 2016?! That was a whole lot of hullabaloo for a TV show still more than a year away… Still, it gives me a chance to get all the way through the original series – ok, so I was up to the bit with the dwarf talking backwards in a dream, which narrows it down a bit, I suppose 😛

        And I’ve just downloaded the techniques book, thanks!

      • Actually… The talking dwarf could be many, many times! It is funny though – looking back – some episodes are a bit embarrassing. (Donna and James come to mind.) But the Cooper in the Lodge scenes? Brilliant! And Audrey is still hot … But I digress 😉

        And the Sherlock fans complain about *their* hiatus? Harumph!

      • Yes, I must confess I was being deliberately disingenuous – you couldn’t swing a cat in TP without hitting a backwards-talking, backwards-walking dwarf of some description. Man, if I’d been especially short of stature back then I’d have taken to random acts of backwards-talking and backwards-walking just to weird out any passing fans of the show 😛

      • ROFL!!!!!

        And you know, to this day, when something bad is about to happen – something that happens all the time – I see / hear that waiter/ giant saying, “it is happening … again. it is *happening* … again …” 😉

        Did you see that part?

      • I seem to remember the “it is happening … again” speech, but I can’t put it to a character. In my mind the characters have become either Coop or dwarves, really. And, having googled Audrey after your previous comment, I do now remember her 😉

      • Ooooh, yes …. gotta love Audrey! Googled the giant for you (sounds obscene, doesn’t it?) — he has his own Wikipedia page. o.O


      • Well, you know what those TP obsessives are like – it wouldn’t surprise me to find that the coffee had its own Wiki page :S

        I must say that reading the Giant’s well-deserved page did make me feel like watching a few episodes..

      • Found this online and immediately thought of you. Then as now, the TP fandom is completely bonkers. 😉


      • When you say “Found this online” that wouldn’t be a roundabout way of saying “I posted this online!” Y’see, I’ve seen this kind of thing before – looks suspiciously like Pic Monkey work… But, hey, I understand if you have a TP-related problem – or if an “alter ego” has a TP-related problem. In fact, let’s not even call it a problem – because we can get you through this, Jen. We WILL get you through this! 😀

      • Oh, I need help, that’s for sure — LOTS of help! But, sadly, I cannot take the credit for *this one*! Or the blame – depending on your point of view 😉

    • Thanks, Georgia. One of the things I enjoy about haiku is how it invites you to slot images together while leaving suitable gaps for pondering, if anyone happens to be in the mood..

    • Thanks, Hamish. And I’ll just take this opportunity to say that there are numerous posts of yours that I’ve enjoyed but haven’t commented on because, when I try, the site wants to start posting to my Twitter feed – which I find odd. But never mind. The “likes”, etc, were there in spirit 🙂

Leave a Reply to Bastet Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s