yesterday drifts off-screen –
a snowy moon tips
fresh silver contours
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This poem was written for Carpe Diem #610, Transformation, another great prompt hosted by Chèvrefeuille at Carpe Diem Haiku Kai. All of the poems in the link-up can be read here. Hmm I can’t think of any songs about Yesterday.. so here’s Marvin Gaye singing beautifully about snowflakes.
Thank you for the outstanding music.
A pleasure!
How neat — never heard that Marvin Gaye song before 🙂
And this is a wonderful mixture of images, Blake — the silver screen, perhaps; white on white on white; and softly sensual too. Very nicely done!
I don’t think I’d heard it before either, though it seems to remind me of another song – a lucky find!
Well, with this I ended up changing every line a bit… after I posted the first version lol.
Ah. Yes. Today’s response to Rengetsu was one of those too. The first version and the final version look like they’re only tangentially related! o.O
So it’s not only us beginners who dither and decide it’s all wrong? That’s good to know. It balances out the impression left by that “notorious” 7 minute haiku 😛
Seven-minute haiku sounds like you “just add water” and then pop it in the microwave! 😉
I’m still very much a beginner — I have so far to go — but it’s the journey, right? 😀
Microwaved haiku… now that would be distinctly non-classical but perhaps a step too far 😛
I think I read on BIOLI the other day that you’d only been haikuing since March – is that right? I was under the impression you’d been 5/7/5-ing for longer than that. I suppose it’s because your work just seems so assured 🙂
Assured? Oh no — I’m a bundle of self-conscious nerves!
Have been haikuing in earnest for about a year and a half; toyed with it for a few months before that. Not very successfully! Sort of like, “whang something together in 5/7/5 and stick a period at the end of it”. Wasn’t till CDHK that I knew how much I didn’t know!
Mmm I think I was fortunate in beginning my haiku interest with someone who finds it impossible to restrict her posts to 5/7/5, but adds lots of commentary and instruction, i.e. you 😀
Aw, shucks 🙂
Good to know that my chattiness is useful occasionally! 😉
Totally off topic — but — saw this cartoon and thought of our conversations —
http://oldpondcomics.wordpress.com/2014/11/29/how-long-it-takes-to-write-a-haiku/
Oh this is always very much on-topic 😦
See, now if I had a haiku name it would be Tadpole. Easy! 😀
LOL!!!!
That’s quite a compliment, though — thank you very much 🙂
A beauty Blake … and that music goes so well with it. PS. I have linked you to the widget.
Thanks, Chèvrefeuille, the song was a last minute choice that seemed to fit well – but then it’s hard to go far wrong with Marvin Gaye 🙂 And thanks for adding me to the link-up, too – so many prompts at CDHK and so little organisational skill on my part 😦
It’s a great artist Marvin Gaye … I like his music.
What a lovely haiku, we can feel the “movement” in your theme of transformation…just stunning! Marvin Gaye complements this beautifully! and is one of my fav singers!
Oh thank you – when you see the winter’s first snowfall at night it’s always quite stunning, isn’t it? Even though it’s the same as the year before and the year before that…
And Marvin Gaye’s song just sets the beauty of that to music, really 🙂
He is on my list when I die, my kids think I`m nuts that I want them to play Sexual healing but I warned them if they didn`t play all my Motown songs I would haunt them.
And no one wants to be haunted by a ghost accusingly whispering “I heard it through the grapevine” in their ear all night…!! So, I’m sure you’ll get your Motown.
Love that first line – can see the day sidling off to the left.
Yes, I wanted a kind of sweeping camera shot with the opening line – glad you liked it.