A Shred of Days

 

A shred of days

Soon capsizes in oceans

Of departure

###

This poem was written for Carpe Diem Ghost Writer #32, A Dream Within A Dream, another great prompt hosted by Chèvrefeuille at Carpe Diem Haiku Kai. In this prompt our guest writer, Jen from Blog It Or Lose It, presented us with “A Dream within a Dream” by Edgar Allan Poe, and asked for our responses. All of the poems in the link-up can be read here. Meanwhile, here’s a wistful Kinks song about days (complete with some classic 1960s BBC radio commentary).

 

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13 thoughts on “A Shred of Days

  1. Ah, the Kinks! You’ve had a great soundtrack lately 😉

    A shred of days, a flow of swallows — your terminology for groups of items — very imaginative and appropriate — very nice!

    Another one, Blake, that begs to be read several times to be appreciated. You give us enough to create an image, a feeling — but not so much that there’s only one interpretation. (If that makes sense.)

    • Sigh… we’ll take the “lateness apologies” as read this time, shall we? 😦

      So, you like the Kinks? Never quite sure how easily they transfer to the USA, since they were the first avowedly English rock’n’roll band. But great songs have a knack of making themselves welcome, regardless 😉

      Despite my late reply, I certainly read this a while ago because I liked your compliment about my “terminology for groups of items” – this comment stayed with me so that, when I was working on Skeletons of Streets I thought “Oo look, I’ve done that again – I don’t really want it to become a habit…” So, I felt a bit self-conscious about it and tried adjusting the line, but “Skeleton streets” or “Skeletal streets” just weren’t as good. And in the end I thought “pfft I’ll keep the line this time and once I’ve written more haiku (that don’t do that) it won’t look so much like a routine I picked up..” 😉

      Again, I’m glad you found it layered enough to be open to interpretation.

      • Oh, the Kinks have a big following here. Early Kinks, especially – though there’s much that goes unheard here, sadly.

        Sorry to have made you self conscious … Rats … Definitely not my intention. But… I can relate to not wanting to get stuck in a poetic groove. I worry about my doves much the same way. But really – this didn’t look routine at all. 🙂

      • Oh self-conscious wasn’t the right word, then, since I didn’t mean to imply any negative connotation – I meant “aware”, that’s all 🙂

        Writing fiction so often I’m always keen to try different approaches to keep it feeling fresh for me. And, as I get more settled in the haiku writing groove , I’d like to try do that here, too. If possible…

      • You’ll find it quite a challenge in haiku – it feels easy to get a pattern going and then run with it each time. I have gotten too comfortable with the gerunds and have been trying to mix it up a bit. But it’s rough with so few syllables available!! So seeing Transtromer and Wright was refreshing -opened new doors.

        But – your prose is amazing. Always fresh, like it’s effortless for you. Quite envious!

      • Why, thank you! Mostly stories do get written relatively smoothly, although I expect that’s partly because I enjoy the process and so don’t pay so much attention to the work involved 🙂 Although the last story I posted was hard work… sheesh! Nearly gave up on it several times.

      • Perhaps that’s why I’m enjoying Bluebottle Bob and Coop so much.. . fun to just write and not think about writing…..

        No writing tonight though…. Computer crash!

      • Finally got something up — the juggler and so weary — but it was hard-fought! And, oh, the handwriting one too. Making the best of a bad situation!

  2. I’m jealous of how you can write these so well. I’ve been trying lately but I’m never satisfied with mine. “A shred of days” is just such a good line. I always take so many words to create images but you can do it with so few.

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