So vivid –
No eyes can take in all the play
Of soon-dying leaves
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This poem was written for Carpe Diem #593, “A Departed Soul” (July 2014) reprise, another great prompt hosted by Chèvrefeuille at Carpe Diem Haiku Kai. All of the poems in the link-up can be read here.
WOW, Blake — the wonder of seeing the life and joy and movement of the leaves — the realization that it’s too much for one lifetime — the realization that death is approaching. Magnificent.
And the accompaniment (Jacques Brel via Scott Walker here) is perfect.
Thanks, Jen. Yes, the prompt was just crying out to have this song as an accompaniment, I thought 🙂
And this is the other side of haiku writing for me (the intriguing side, as opposed to the headachey side lol) – Cycling the other day, I turned a corner and was suddenly faced with a high wall of trees and hedges, all their various shapes and multi-coloured leaves flickering in the sun; and it was really beautiful but just too vivid to take in. You know when what you’re looking at is so intense that it’s almost a little painful, so you have to look away? Well, with my haiku eyes now open I wanted to try to capture that moment, whereas before I’d have passed it by. Then it seemed to fit the prompt quite well.
…and that’s what is likely to keep me in that cramped and leaky little boat for a while 🙂
Wow – can really imagine this — it would have been an overpowering sight, that’s for sure — and those moments cry out for haiku don’t they? You did a great job, gracefully fitting that imagery into 17 short syllables. Faced with such a task, perhaps there is a bit of comfort and security in having such a small boat!
I’m really enjoying your haiku — you do this so well — so impressed with your talent. This is one of those jaw-dropping haiku. 🙂
Magnificent haiku … right on and very descriptive though beautifully concise and illusive.
Oh that’s nice to hear – having recently started writing haiku, it can feel a bit tricky to get the right amount of description in so concise a space 🙂
How well I know the sensation … you’ve really got the hang of the art … seems you’re a natural to me 🙂
What a genuine feeling, to see those soon-dying leaves. Autumn… And the rest is yellow silence.
Best wishes, dear Sue, Aquileana 😀
“And the rest is yellow silence” – what a wonderful turn of phrase you have, dear Aquileana! 🙂
A very strong haiku Blake … i sense the feeling of departing summer, the coloring leaves …. awesome!
Thanks, Kristjaan, glad you like it. It was one of those sights you come across, by chance, which make an impression – and then the prompt arrived and gave me a direction for it, luckily 🙂